The Best Key Peele Office Homophobe

[rhythmic bass beat, sensual moans] ♪ ♪ – LATRELL? – WHAT’S UP, BABY GIRL? – CAN YOU PLEASE TURN THAT OFF? – WHY, YOU DON’T LIKE MY MUSIC? – IS IT MUSIC? BECAUSE IT SOUNDS LIKE A BUNCH OF SEX NOISES OVER A BASS LINE. – OH. I GET IT. YOU DON’T LIKE MY MUSIC ‘CAUSE I’M GAY.

YOU CAN’T HANDLE A GAY MAN’S MUSIC. – NO, NO, NO. IT’S–I’M TRYING TO WORK HERE, AND THAT MUSIC IS WEIRDLY SEXUAL. – OH, I SEE.

SO MY SEXUALITY IS WEIRD. YOU JUST CAN’T FATHOM A MAN BEING ATTRACTED TO ANOTHER MAN. – I CAN FATHOM IT. IT’S– CAN YOU JUST PLEASE LISTEN TO SOME OTHER GAY MUSIC, LIKE BARBRA STREISAND OR SOMETHING– – OH, I SEE, I SEE.

OKAY. SO LISTENING TO BARBRA STREISAND IS GAY. STEREOTYPE MUCH? [keys clacking] SO YOU SEEING ANYBODY LATELY? – YEAH, I-I MEAN, KIND OF. I THINK– – ‘CAUSE I GOT IT GOOD LAST NIGHT.

OH, IT WAS LIKE, DAMN! I MEAN, MY MAN WAS LIKE, BLOP! LIKE, HE HAD A BABY ARM HOLDING ON TO A APPLE. – AW, DON’T CALL IT A BABY ARM. – AW. I SEE.

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SO YOU CAN’T HANDLE HEARING ABOUT HOW I’M GAY. I’M SORRY. – YOU JUST REFERRED TO YOUR BOYFRIEND’S PENIS AS A BABY’S ARM HOLDING AN APPLE. – WELL, THAT’S WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE.

AND IT’S NOT MY BOYFRIEND, BY THE WAY. AND quot;ANYWHATS,quot; YOU’RE HOMOPHOBIC. – NO, NO, NO. THAT’S NOT HOMOPHOBIC, OKAY? YOU’RE EXPLICITLY TALKING ABOUT SEXUAL THINGS IN THE WORKPLACE.

– FINE. THERE’S PLENTY OF STUFF THAT WE CAN TALK ABOUT. YOU KNOW, UH, MY PENIS CUP, MY SCROTUM COZIES THAT I HAVE BEEN KNITTING RECENTLY– OH, WITH THESE KNITTING NEEDLES THAT I HAVE JUST NOTICED LOOK LIKE LITTLE, SKINNY, PURPLE PENISES, ET CETERA AND ET CETERA. – OH, MY GOD.

– CAN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE, AND THEN YOU TELL ME IF IT’S GOOD FOR FACEBOOK? – OKAY, I’M FAIRLY CERTAIN YOU’RE GOING TO SHOW ME SOMETHING OVERTLY SEXUAL. – DON’T YOU PREJUDGE ME! HERE IT IS. – AGH! [bleep]! THAT’S A CLOSE-UP OF AN ANUS. – OH, NO, THAT’S NOTi AN/i ANUS.

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THAT’S MY ANUS, BABY GIRL. – THAT’S DISGUSTING. – OH, I SEE. SO YOU DON’T WANT TO SEE A CLOSE-UP PICTURE OF MY ANUS ‘CAUSE YOU HATE GUY MEN.

– NO. I DON’T WANT TO LOOK AT A CLOSE-UP PICTURE OF ANYONE’S ANUS. – HOMOPHOBE. HOMOPHOBE.

THERE’S A HOMOPHOBE RIGHT HERE. HO– [blows whistle] HOMOPHOBE ALERT! [high-pitched voice] HOMOPHOBE! [imitating siren wailing] – HEY. – HEY, BABY. HOW’S IT GOING? – GOOD.

READY TO GO TO LUNCH? – YEAH. UH, LATRELL, THIS IS GAVIN. GAVIN, THIS IS LATRELL. THIS IS MY BOYFRIEND.

– HOW YOU DOING? – I’M–I’M– I’M DOING VERY WELL. HOW–HOW ARE YOU DOING, GAVIN–GAVIN? – GREAT. WANT TO GO? – YEAH. – NICE TO MEET YOU.

– NO, TRUST ME. IT’S NOT. – NO? – THAT’S THE GUY. – OH.

– OH. I GET IT. I’M NOT PERSECUTED. I’M JUST A ASSHOLE.

AH.